So it all started one day when i was cleaning my room. I had just found two gift cards to a electronic store nearby, and i thought i needed some new computer gear. I went over to the electronic store, and bought a Logitech mouse+keyboard combo, and headset. I then went home again, plugged them in, and waited. Everything worked fine, and i had no problems with the items whatsoever. It's starting to get late, so i go to sleep.
Suddenly i woke up. It was not my alarm that woke me up this time. The clock was 2 am. The computer was on. I sat down in my chair, and decided that i would shut it down. As soon as i put on my headset, a blade came out of the mic, and cut my throat. The headset then turned into a sort of mask, with only the eyes, nose and mouth showing. But i wasn't dead. I could still control my hands, and the rest of my body. I needed to get my headset off, because i had to go to school the day after. I tried to use the keyboard, but the only thing i could write was SATAN SATAN SATAN. I tried to use the mouse, but i could only move it around in a pattern of 666. In the middle of the screen was the text LOGITECH. Underneath it stood with a smaller font THE FUTURE OF COMPUTING. Behind the text were a image of Satan. It was hyper-realistic, and my eyes melted into a deep brown substance. Suddenly Logitech Support came up on the screen. I asked "How can i take this headset off?" Jeff the Killer appeared on the screen, and said "You just have to go to sleep." So i tried my best to relax and fall afsleep.
When i woke up i noticed something. The words LOGITECH IS EVIL and LOGITECH LOVES SATAN was burned into my forehead. A few years later i were contaced by Logitech, and they offered me a job as "Satans Support Group". I accepted, and i become very good friends with Jeffrey.